I've always maintained that I was not being hired on jobs because I was transgendered. I knew deep in my heart that if someone SOMEWHERE took the chance on me, they wouldn't regret it.
At Kinko's, my first review jumped me from Beginner Associate past Intermedia to Advanced. I got a dollar an hour raise.
At Dell, my managers fought over me to keep me from getting laid off. I was the only one who CONSISTENTLY broke quota every day.
When I work, I do my damndest to give you my 110% best.
When I got hired onto this Harte-Hanks job, I hated it. I still do hate it. But I gave it my best. 110%. I had one of the general managers there compliment me and I had a choice of what schedule I got. I heard rumours around me that they were going to hire me in a week or two. I was told point blank I was one of their best phone reps quality wise.
And they let me go.
Why?
Because I use the women's restroom. And as long as I'm representing myself female, I REFUSE to use the men's room.
PERIOD.
The lesson here is: It doesn't matter how good you are. It doesn't matter how much you give. It doens't matter how much jumping through hoops you do. If you're a freak - you're expendable.
If this world doesn't want me, perhaps it's time to move on to the next.
At Kinko's, my first review jumped me from Beginner Associate past Intermedia to Advanced. I got a dollar an hour raise.
At Dell, my managers fought over me to keep me from getting laid off. I was the only one who CONSISTENTLY broke quota every day.
When I work, I do my damndest to give you my 110% best.
When I got hired onto this Harte-Hanks job, I hated it. I still do hate it. But I gave it my best. 110%. I had one of the general managers there compliment me and I had a choice of what schedule I got. I heard rumours around me that they were going to hire me in a week or two. I was told point blank I was one of their best phone reps quality wise.
And they let me go.
Why?
Because I use the women's restroom. And as long as I'm representing myself female, I REFUSE to use the men's room.
PERIOD.
The lesson here is: It doesn't matter how good you are. It doesn't matter how much you give. It doens't matter how much jumping through hoops you do. If you're a freak - you're expendable.
If this world doesn't want me, perhaps it's time to move on to the next.
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I wish there was something I could do.. =/
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Date: 2002-12-04 04:34 am (UTC)This world still wants you, even if some of the people in it find you hard to accept... No, this world needs you because of those people.
If I can help, let me know. I considered starting soemthing to force Adecco to give you your job back, but you've said it wasn't really what you want to do anyway.
You might not understand this, but I admire your strength and courage.
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Date: 2002-12-04 08:28 am (UTC)I'm sorry....I'm also frustrated on your behalf.
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Date: 2002-12-04 12:20 pm (UTC)>job back, but you've said it wasn't really what you want to do anyway.
Please don't try to initiate any legl means to force Adecco to give me my job back. First of all, it's not Adecco, it's Harte Hanks. Secondly, I want the managers at Adecco and Harte Hanks to try and realize it's their stupid policy that isn't letting me work. And thirdly, I wasn't too fond of the job anyway.
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Date: 2002-12-04 12:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-04 12:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-04 04:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-12-04 06:39 pm (UTC)It's almost like you're purposefully screwing up just so you can stay miserable. You might be giving 110% work-wise, but that doesn't count for anything if you're undermining yourself in other ways. Sometimes you need to Just Do It, no matter how hard it is, because if you don't then you're dooming YOURSELF to continue living in shit... And it's nobody's fault but your own.
I care about you Jenn and it makes me sad to see you letting yourself fall again and again. Don't screw things up for yourself just to stay miserable, don't say "the world hates me so i'm going to commit suicide". No. The world gave you an opportunity and you didn't grab it and hold on for dear life like you should've. Next time you have to, you know. No matter what happens, you have to hold on, because you deserve everything good that will happen to you when you do.
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You bet. Being miserable is a great fun place to be. So much so, that I realized, once I got a job, I liked where I'd been for the last two years. The adventure of never knowing where you're going to live. The thrill of living off my friends for sympathy and cash. I just love it.
You saw through me, Allison. Absolutely. You get the prize. Congratulations.