Wow, this seems to have been written by a someone who ingested large amounts of LSD and fell asleep

[dolari]

Last night I was reading Aint-It-Cool-News when I came across THIS.

Supposedly, this is the entire storyline for Star Wars Episode III. And while I'd LOVE to see a Black Lightsaber, something tells me...well...it's a buncha bull.

However, it got me thinking about a few nights ago when I dreamed I went and saw Episode III. Here's how the movie played in my mind:

The Clone War has ended, and Annikin and the Jedi are decimated. Annikin is more machine now than man, just like Obi Wan said in Jedi. Very little of him is left in a human form.

Padme complains that he has gone cold, and honestly he has in more than just emotions...his body being mostly mechanical is no longer the same body that used to warm her at night. The same body that got her pregnant. She realizes now that their marriage was a mistake and leaves him. He smashes his hand down in anger, it splits in two only making him madder.

Of course, Annikin goes nuts, and when Obi Wan tries to tell him "Dude, she's right...it was all a mistake" he basially gives into his anger and tries to make Obi's face into Chicken McNuggets on the spot. The two duel, with Obi trying to be very very defensive, and talk Annikin out of his anger. Instead Annikin gets meaner and Obi decides that Annikin ain't gonna stop till he's toast, and kills him by dumping him into a volcanic lake...not deeply mind you, just enough to make him evem more scarred and hurt.

In a hospital, Padme visits Annikin one last time, just to make sure he's okay. She sees that he is virtually all machine, now, including respirator. She feels bad for him, and he plays on her sympathies, but her mind doesn't change. She's still leaving him.

Palpatine visits him, noting how Padme has left him, the Jedi don't trust him, he's lost everything...but he can get revenge. Join the Dark Side and control the Galaxy.

With new body, respirator and a mean looking red lightsaber, Annikin, now Darth Vader, kills the remaining Jedi. The clones, reacting to an implanted command turn against the Republic siding with Palpatine, and Vader basically takes care of anyone dissenting.

In all this, Yoda and Obi Wan escape after faking their own deaths, putting Padme, the recently born Luke and Leia in hiding on various planets and the Empire is born.

Mind you, there's enough info out there now to make a pretty compelling Episode III for yourself...so I guess my brain just tried to bridge the gap between II and IV. Did a pretty reasonable job if I do say so myself....