My lower intestine is NOT an accordion to be played at your whim!

[dolari]

Living arrangements:

You know...I see Dean's point now.

I've often wondered why he keeps me around. I'm his ex, his "new" girlfriend doesn't like me and vice versa. So why keep me around? I figured it out today.

1) We're good friends, still. Always a plus when being roomates.
2) When both of us are working, we REALLY make money.
3) When both of us are working, out bills are REAL cheap.
4) We enjoy each other's company. Again, a plus.

It really surrised me when Dean said "Let's get a two bedroom." I always considered myself a working guest. Like when I stayed with Erin - this was only until I got on my feet. Instead we're now not only both on our feet, but making money hand over fist in a bad economy because of it.

This isn't to say I want to leave or move out...I thought that way before I found out that Dean wanted me to stay. But the more I think about it, the more it makes sense.

My only problem with this is the stress he puts himself through appeasing his girlfriend. Occasioanlly I feel like "The Other Woman."

"Fame":
On a scale of 0 - 10 of celebrity, 10 being Will Smith, and 0 being "Local boy makes good" I like to think I'm a 3. Maybe a 4.

I was talking with someone who is definately a 4 who told me that they don't really dont like being on the scale at all. So much of being a 4 is making sure to have the right face on and being nice and putting up with a lot of stuff that you wouldn't normally. Youre not yourself anymore.

For what it's worth, I enjoy it. One - it's attention. Who doesn't like attention.

But also, when I was younger, I had someone I really looked up to in the field I wanted to be in. He was a success, and I saw him at least twice a month, and was "in his presence often." Wouldn't give me the time of day. He wasn't malicious, wasn't mean or sneering...I just was unworthy of his attention.

And now that I have my own little fandom, I refuse to just wave someone off. When I get fan letters, I do my best to answer them, even if it's just a simple "Thank you." If I don't answer, it's because an answer isnt warranted or expected. At the con, I was happy to have people come up and talk to me. Friends and fans alike were treated the same way, and I made time to talk to anyone who talked to me.

I have three levels of AIM. K1tana is for everyone. Anyone in the world can talk to me there, and I do my best to respond (Fed Ex can turn a 5 minute conversation to a 50 one, though.) I've only every blocked two people from talking to me, one a fan who took things a little too far, and another was just an angry angry soul. If there are times I don't want to talk to fans, but friends, there's another name. A third is "family" only. You know who they are.

I refuse to be the person who never even said Thank You when I bought one of his comics right from his hands.

Warped Meme-age:
Okay, here's a meme that's running around, but with a little twist:

Leave a comment with your name if you want to know what I really think of you, and I'll reply and tell you. No lies, all honesty. However...if you've friended me. Tell me why. And if I friended you first, why did you friend me back?

Comments

[chrysalis.livejournal.com]

jenesta

And I believe that I friended you first because of Nathan. Oh great jenndolari. :)

[kengr]

Leave a comment with your name if you want to know what I really think of you, and I'll reply and tell you. No lies, all honesty. However...if you've friended me. Tell me why. And if I friended you first, why did you friend me back?

I friended you because of your comics and possibly some comments you made in someone else's LJ.

ps. responding to this is a bit scary for me...

[gwenners.livejournal.com]

I was talking with someone who is definately a 4 who told me that they don't really dont like being on the scale at all. So much of being a 4 is making sure to have the right face on and being nice and putting up with a lot of stuff that you wouldn't normally. Youre not yourself anymore.

I dunno if I'm on that scale at all, but I do know a lot of the stuff that "4" goes through.

Cheers,
Gwen Smith

[zaecus.livejournal.com]

[Insert Appropriate Name(s) Here]

[Insert Inappropriate Name(s) Here]

YHWH

Not sure who friended who first, but considering how we met and that we managed to come out of it and not be distrustful enough of each other to get in the way of friendship, I'm not sure it really matters.

[inefficient.livejournal.com]

I feel weird responding to these kinds of memes, but I will anyway...

inefficient

I friended you after reading aadroma's tribute to your 2-year anniversary. I then started reading your journal and was intrigued by your wit, struggles and obvious intelligence. It didn't hurt that you are tg and that's already a point of intrigue for me (being tg as well).

[multiphonikks.livejournal.com]

Nebghel!

Not sure who added who first... I think it was mutually assured destruction?!?!

AS for the meeting... hmmm.. I seem to recall being a butch dyke in shining guitar case at some point... Maybe not...

AS for the fame... Hmm... I'm somewhere around a 4... maybe ...

It sucks ... sometimes... - In real life, it's kinda fun sometimes, but on LJ and IM communities it's a real pain in the butt because everyone seems to think that I'm there bestest buddy...

[multiphonikks.livejournal.com]

OH... MY...GOD>..

I'm sorry for the terrible spelling! I've driven 200 miles today... call it brain cell degredation!


"THEY'RE" NOT THERE...*

sigh.... :)

[drkbish.livejournal.com]

Well, we were friends on AIM before I got a LJ... so it seemed only natural to friend you when I DID get a LJ.

Now... do I REALLY want to hear this? ;-)

[ghostangel.livejournal.com]

Yeah okay :)

I originally got ahold of you via AIM, and liked your comics, and it grew from there :D

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

You're a tough one. :) I've only been reading you for sometime, and the one time we met there were a good number of other issues going on. :)

The impression I get of you is someone who is very deep, and very knowledgable of things in the...unseeable. I'm surprised you asked me for help in something I didn't really understand all that well, since you're someone I would like to just pick your brains on the subject.

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

Actually...I dont' have much of a handle on you. You're rather "new" on my list, much of your journal is memes, and what isn't a meme is pretty widely scattershot.

What I do know, though, is that you're a wonderful person with a definate idea of who you are, everything be damned. I admire a lot of you courage to live the way you do, wearing what you what when you want no matter what it is.

I'm too chicken for that. ;)

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

You are, at the very LEAST, a 5. :)

I'm assuming you're posting here for that whole "lemme tell ya what I think" meme, so here we go.

You are possibly one of the oldest friends I have on the net, with the possible excetions of JennConspiracy and Phil Zeman. You've been a rolemodel for me, a sounding board, you've been there when I needed ya, and helped me though some VERY VERY bleak times.

I really appreciate your friendship, you are someone I wouldn't want to lose. 5 or no 5. :)

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

YHWH
YHWH VZVK YHWH
HNYBMhKhKRTK
VZVK ZSKVMB VZVK
MTKNA MTSP MYSPSP MYSNVYD
NTSIRQ zTTYGBA GTzTRTB SKYDGN QZPLGY INTDKhK TYzTVKS

You, Bjorn and Carrot are the few otherkin I actually consider REALLY otherkin. You dont have the aura of "teen angst" most everyone else in the society seemed to have, and are genuinely an amazing multifaceted person (pun intended).

I enjoy talking with you because you can be talking about Regular Run of the Mill stuff, and manage to mix something mystical into it. I really digs ya, and am actually a bit jealous of the love you and Estasia share, since it's so deep. Mine was never that deep.

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

I do not understand your politics. Some of your views have downright angered me. I havent (and won't) argue them, but it perplexes me the political mindset you have. I do appreciate, though, that your views are well thought out and you have reasons for the way you think...because politically too many people don't THINK.

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

I absolutely am amazed at someone who can just MAKE music. My poetry skills SUCK. My music writing ability is nonexistent...

Beyond that, I really dig your chipper attitude, you always have a smile and everytime I've talked to you, you come across as someone with a big grin on their face.

You are also fun to talk to, and put a spin on TGness that I don't get from others. Most of the eople I talk to are very serious about it, while you seem to put a fun spin on it.

And you have THE cutest accent.

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

Hee. :)

I look at you, and I see me 7 years ago. Involved deep in the world of Mortal Kombat, although in a much closer relationship to Midway than I ever had.

But where I just threw my hands up at the whole "MK society," you helped make something where that same society could actually congreagate and maybe say a positive thing or two once in a while. :) In that respect, you not only BECAME me, but surpassed me.

MK aside, you're a great friend, and someone who I'm glad to know. Sometimes you're a LITTLE over my head with the tech stuff, but I'll catch up eventually. :)

I owe you a dinner, still. I'm headed to Royer's pretty soon. Wanna come along? :D

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

I like you. A lot. :)

I dig your ability to stand up for what you beolieve in no matter what, wether it's housing problems or not buying into a cult of personality. You brave through it, and while it smarts sometimes and sometimes is amazingly HARD, you pull through.

I think you're about to pull through to something better, though, so keep slogging through it all. :)

[chrysalis.livejournal.com]

I find that often I know more than I think, but I rarely figure that out until I ask someone. Ironically, one of the things I asked you about once I was able to link with something someone else said along the same lines several months later. The result was I combined the two and everything went beautifully. :)

Thank you muchly for the compliment! Can't wait until next time we meet and I'm a little more "there". Hehe.

[kengr]

Well, a lot of the "meat" is under various filters. But I really should do a better job of journalling. It's just that too many days amount to "messed around on the computer all day".

And I'm not as brave as you make out. Other wise, I'd have been getting body waxes regularly to make it easier to wear what I want. But I'm chicken to call the places a som folks in the local T community recommended.

[kengr]

BTW, for a bit more "insight", check the poetry at one of my *other* websites (yes, I compartmentalize)

http://www.shadowgard.com/~kengr/poetry.html

I advise against reading the fiction on that site though. Unless your interests are a lot different than most folks. The fiction on Brooke's site is less disturbing, though I'm going to get lynched if I don't update things soon.

[emilydm.livejournal.com]

I might as well throw my hat into the ring. I had been reading CS for quite some time, and found your LJ through Jade Gordon's. I put you on my AIM list about the same time.

[stealthts.livejournal.com]

Hi Jenn. :) I added you to my friends list when I discovered you had an LJ, after reading CS. I'm also reading AWFW now, since I didn't even know if its existance till you mentioned it in one of your posts.

I've seen, from some of your posts, that at times you think you're a hack. *I* do *not* see you as a hack. I think your art is great and honestly, I think the story line is even better.

Though I haven't met you in Real Life(tm) as of yet, I hope to some day at one of the Cons. You seem, to me, to be a wonderful thoughtful person.

Stay safe Jenn. :)

Mel

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

I've only been reading your journal just lately, so I don't really have a complete handle on you yet (other than the nightmare thing that happened a few weeks ago). I dig reading your journal, though. It's very slice-of-life ish without a lot of the angst or "woe is me" you get from other TG related journals.

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

I hate to say it, but you are SO new on my list, literally a week or two, that I can't say anything. Honestly. Nice to meet you, though. :D

[inefficient.livejournal.com]

Actually I kind of expected that kind of response. I suspect much of your anger is spurred by my support of GWB. I can understand that. He seems to be one of those figures who is ultra-polarizing. He doesn't engender a lot of lukewarm support of lukewarm dislike. You either support him or hate him it seems.

I'd like to return the favor and tell you that I think you are a truly wonderful woman. I wish you had more confidence in yourself IRL. Your online persona is warm, funny, intelligent and just an interesting person to know. I hope that in real life, those qualities are allowed to show.

I am glad to have found your journal, even if we aren't compatible politically, you are a joy to read. :)

heh

[stealthts.livejournal.com]

That's ok Jenn. I'll give you time so you too can say, like all of my friends "I like you, but you are *SUCH* a dork."

My fiance, especially, likes to call me a dork. :)

Mel

Friending

[iqtech.livejournal.com]

I've tried writing this many times but words fail me too often. It goes back to that old Sufi saying "What cannot be spoken, cannot be spoken. And it cannot be whistled either."
There really aren't words for why I "friended" you. Just that you had that quality of "light" that I have seen/felt/heard in all the people I now count among my long term friends.

Re: Friending

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

You are singlehandedly the most generous thoughtful person I've ever known. No joke. To the point that I was once creeped out by it to be honest (comes from living in a family where generosity wasn't something you did voluntarily).

In the meantime, I'm glad I got over it and got to know you better. You're truly a sweet and nice person, right down to the core. And I likes ya. :D