WHERE'S MY BREAKFAST!? WHERE'S MY BREAKFAST!?!?

[dolari]

"I had them super size my napkin. They gave me this napkin the saize of a sheet. Then I asked 'Will you supersize anything?' and they said 'Yeah.' 'So will you supersize my straw?' And then he gves me a straw that's like a baseball bat. Then I supersized my salt, and they brought out a wheelbarrow of rocks."

"Yes, modern homemmakers know that bugs are irritating and breed in your home almost as quickly as elves. Here's a nightmare scenario...you're on a raft with Led Zeppelin, the Y2K bug...."
"Okay, dude, this has NOTHING to do with pest control!"
"You hear that Sifl? It's....Led Zeppelin....."

"If only I had a simple ancient form of man to help me around the house, maybe I could get some frickin' sleep....I'M EXHAUSTED."

"Dude, you're a genius!"
"Do I gotta go live in a lamp?"

"NOTHING WILL SATISFY YOU LIKE TWELVE INCHES OF HAMSTER!"

"Look. can't I just give you a normal lapdance for once?"
"No baby, we've been through this before, there's only one way I enjoy this."
"But I left the ski boots and carrot costume at home, I didn't think you were coming in today!"
"Whatever, just talk about bread and call me Napoleon."

"So I'm sitting there, and all these guys have this funny, like, space-slang. And these guys are old and went tospace a long time ago. He's like 'Try the pie, it's better than shit in space!' I'm like 'Are you sayng this tastes like space shit?' He's all 'No, ain't you never shit in a floating room before?' I'm like 'Look, I just want to eat and get out of here, right?'"
"Did you try the pie?"
"Yeah, it was delicious."

"Let your lapdog power your laptop."

"You gotta take down the blanket fort in the living room, dude...it's getting huge."
"You mean the Estate?"

"I'm glad I got my underwear back. I was freezing my crunchberries off."