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Dec. 17th, 2023 02:39 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dolariIt's funny how different things are.
When I was younger, and just transitioning, I was terrified of going out. I made quick trips, left early, stayed in. Often because I knew there would be trouble if I stayed in one place too long. People would stare, laugh, call me out. Occasionally threats.
Thirty years later, I am in my element. Walking through town in my outfits, not worried about how I looked, how I was walking, how I way moving. Just BEING. Not worrying about wether my voice would make people laugh, if my moving too quickly or stiffly would get someone's unwanted attention.
Sure, this is a more tolerant environment than Texas, or even Pennsylvania. But I'm not worried that I wasn't emulating being a woman correctly anymore. I simply am one. I always was. I just needed the space to realize that and an environment that didn't constantly make me question it.
That's a wonderful feeling.
When I was younger, and just transitioning, I was terrified of going out. I made quick trips, left early, stayed in. Often because I knew there would be trouble if I stayed in one place too long. People would stare, laugh, call me out. Occasionally threats.
Thirty years later, I am in my element. Walking through town in my outfits, not worried about how I looked, how I was walking, how I way moving. Just BEING. Not worrying about wether my voice would make people laugh, if my moving too quickly or stiffly would get someone's unwanted attention.
Sure, this is a more tolerant environment than Texas, or even Pennsylvania. But I'm not worried that I wasn't emulating being a woman correctly anymore. I simply am one. I always was. I just needed the space to realize that and an environment that didn't constantly make me question it.
That's a wonderful feeling.
