FINEST K.O. - You lose.

[dolari]

I can't believe it. She WON.

About 8PM - I hear waterworks. My sister and Dad NEVER talk to each other. EVER. Unless she wants something. So basically, I get called in and reamed for being so mean to her, never allowed to get myseide across, and now I'm not supposed to be on the internet...AT ALL.

FUCK THAT. Already I've resurrected my K4sumi account from beign deleted because Dad never EVER changes his password, and made my account the master account. Let's see if yuo can delete THAT you fucker.

I have a sister who is 24, going on SEVEN. A father who is FIFTY THREE going on twelve. A mother who is FIFTY going on Darth Vader. And then me. 27 going on Cinderella.

Sometimes the forces of good CANNOT defeat the forces of evil. Especially when they gang up on you. And I think it's time for a tactical retreat. Actually, a tactical abandonnment.

Yup. Run away, jus tlikeI always do. Run to Geri's. Run to Pennsylvania. Run back home.

I spent this whole evening binge eating. It was I could do to keep from burning this house down.

What have I gained since coming here? A roof, and three squares a day (well, more like eighteen a day the way this family eats). What have I lost? My identity, my independence, my self-respect, my health and my happiness.

I think I may need to go to Austin a lot SOONER than Friday. And may need to be for more than just a visit.

Tonight I apply for EVERY damned job I can find in Austin. This employment problem ENDS NOW. This family situation ENDS NOW.

Here I am less than a person. I am a utility.
I am not a utility. I am a PERSON.

Comments

[fmcarrot.livejournal.com]

Christ...

I'm sorry, I really am.

I think I used to do what she does.....when I was 5. -_-

I can relate to you.

[ladymisty.livejournal.com]

Hi there, you know what you're writing about the Hell of living at home sounds very familiar. That's what happened to me this summer, after I got back from France. I couldn't move back to my own house because I had rented it out while I was gone so the tenants' lease wasn't up yet. I stayed with my family in the meantime, and it quickly became Hell.

Then, after my tenants had left, I stayed with my family rather than coming 'home' to a big empty house (this is when my fiance was having an affair and so on, he was staying with his own family, not with me). It actually ended with mom kicking me out (which she later denied) - so I was forced to move out, back to my own place, a big empty house. It was hard, but after all, it was worth it. You can't stay there, you'll go crazy. That's my advice. Get out, you're way too old to be living with mom and dad and your annoying sister. You obviously are a strong person and need to be on your own, independent. That's my two cents worth. If you ever come to Nova Scotia, I have a spare room, let me know! I'll show you around.

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the sympathy...

...thankfully...karma's a bitch. ;)

Re: I can relate to you.

[jenndolari.livejournal.com]

Between you and Elenderel inviting me up north, I might just take you up on your offer. ;)

I've been reading your journal on and off for a while now, and I thought I had it bad...if you ever need a place away from yer troubles, I DO need a roomie in a few months in Austin, Tx. :)

Thanks for the ncouraging words...you should see what karma had instore for my family today. ;)

[(Anonymous)]

DO NOT LOOK BACK.

Your very identiy gets attacked, your contacts with your friends and the rest of the world get attacked, the world comes to a firey end et c. when you look back to San Antonio. Maybe it will sink in this time.

You are free to go but DO NOT LOOK BACK AGAIN!


SL