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I'm considering writing again.
I dot' want to write. Things get bad when Iwrite. But there's SOMETHING demanding to be written. After the debacle that was A Wish for Wings, I DON'T want to do this. But dammit if it ain't happening on it's own.
In everyone of my stories, is a piece of my life.
Closetspace - While the characters crossdress and two of them are self professed transsexuals, it's actually the least biographical of my stories. But it did have it's basis in real life: There was a time that I really did believe I could move in wiht another woman and pull it off convincingly. From that, the story went up on it's own.
A Wish for Wings had a lot of my own life in it. I used to see the shadows that Andrea sees. Her time with the CEA mirrors my time with the Cartoon/Fantasy Organization and the Boulton & Park society. Michael and Andreas later relationship was Deener and myself (minus Michaels utimate fate).
The Book of Zand...Zand is a personal exploration. Once upon a time, I was a bitter, cynical and evil person. I manipulated people and was pretty vile. I've since changed (I hope!)...but Zand is an experiment...a projection of me if I had never had a serious change in attitude. What if a man held all the grudges, all the pains, hurts, and slaps, and dwelled on them over 2,000 years? In Book 1, his relationship with Susan mirrors my breakup with Deener. Book 2 has an incident where Zand is blamed for breaking someones arm...something I did as a child (I blamed someone I KNEW didn't break my own arm just to save face), and the manipulation fantasies I harbored. Book 3 was an exploration of the feeling that things happening to me were beyond my control. Book 4 was about my childhood wish to be a woman. Book 8 was about realizing hte terrible terrible thoughts I had during my first puberty (horrid thoughts). Book 9 is about the value of friendship in a crisis - most of the characters are my current friends. Book 10, though is very personal, and chronicles an amnesiac Zand, who is MUCH MUCH closer to what I have become, with no pains and no grudges, looking back at the terrible things he had done.
The new story, though....
It's a story about a teenaged girl who, as she goes through puberty, notices that her face is slowly turning white in blotches. OR, begins to grow a Rock & Rule type mammal-muzzle...not decided yet. And the parents who become embarassed of her. It's a LONG way from being finished in my head, and I still don't know if I'll ever put it on paper. But if I DO, and that's a REALLY big if, it will be a semi symbolic/fictional retelling of my life.
If I put pen to paper.
Friday I went to Austin to see Dean all day. Good time was had by all. Today, nothing. Which is why this is so short. :)
I dot' want to write. Things get bad when Iwrite. But there's SOMETHING demanding to be written. After the debacle that was A Wish for Wings, I DON'T want to do this. But dammit if it ain't happening on it's own.
In everyone of my stories, is a piece of my life.
Closetspace - While the characters crossdress and two of them are self professed transsexuals, it's actually the least biographical of my stories. But it did have it's basis in real life: There was a time that I really did believe I could move in wiht another woman and pull it off convincingly. From that, the story went up on it's own.
A Wish for Wings had a lot of my own life in it. I used to see the shadows that Andrea sees. Her time with the CEA mirrors my time with the Cartoon/Fantasy Organization and the Boulton & Park society. Michael and Andreas later relationship was Deener and myself (minus Michaels utimate fate).
The Book of Zand...Zand is a personal exploration. Once upon a time, I was a bitter, cynical and evil person. I manipulated people and was pretty vile. I've since changed (I hope!)...but Zand is an experiment...a projection of me if I had never had a serious change in attitude. What if a man held all the grudges, all the pains, hurts, and slaps, and dwelled on them over 2,000 years? In Book 1, his relationship with Susan mirrors my breakup with Deener. Book 2 has an incident where Zand is blamed for breaking someones arm...something I did as a child (I blamed someone I KNEW didn't break my own arm just to save face), and the manipulation fantasies I harbored. Book 3 was an exploration of the feeling that things happening to me were beyond my control. Book 4 was about my childhood wish to be a woman. Book 8 was about realizing hte terrible terrible thoughts I had during my first puberty (horrid thoughts). Book 9 is about the value of friendship in a crisis - most of the characters are my current friends. Book 10, though is very personal, and chronicles an amnesiac Zand, who is MUCH MUCH closer to what I have become, with no pains and no grudges, looking back at the terrible things he had done.
The new story, though....
It's a story about a teenaged girl who, as she goes through puberty, notices that her face is slowly turning white in blotches. OR, begins to grow a Rock & Rule type mammal-muzzle...not decided yet. And the parents who become embarassed of her. It's a LONG way from being finished in my head, and I still don't know if I'll ever put it on paper. But if I DO, and that's a REALLY big if, it will be a semi symbolic/fictional retelling of my life.
If I put pen to paper.
Friday I went to Austin to see Dean all day. Good time was had by all. Today, nothing. Which is why this is so short. :)
